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I'd write more, like you said I should. If only, there was more to me.

Thursday, August 24, 2006

THE SANDY FILES

Thanks all for flooding my inbox with queries about the new literary star on my blog - the unparalleled Sandy Gandhi.

I'll attempt to answer them all:

- Yes, she is for real... and I thought that picture was proof.
- No, I really, really didn't write the piece posted below.
Heck, if I had that talent I'd have given Jug Suraiya a run for his money many moons ago.
- Does she write in cyberspace?
Since we've been speaking on each others behalf, I am certain she sure will.
- Does she have a book?
Last I heard (which was this morning) she had trekked to the LightHouse for inspiration.
- Where does she perform?
At Byron Bay of course, which, for the Australians is a hop, skip and jump away from Brisbane. You might want to think again if a three hour drive after a long haul flight sounds way too much. Alternately, you could host her talent, by emailing her @ sandy.gandhi@bigpond.com
- Is she related to the Gandhis?
She was last spotted at the Byron Bay Writers Festival with a copy of 'Inhaling the Mahatma' - who knows.

As further proof that her writing rocks, here are some excerpts from the motherload of articles that Sandy gave me to make up for the lack of humour on my book shelf:

"These days, my body is really is beautiful because at the age of 48, I find my eyesight is failing. All wrinkles have magically disappeared and between you and I, I'm looking pretty hot.... Luckily for us here in Australia, it's a well known fact that beauty's in the eye of the BEER HOLDER!" (From: Body Beautiful)

"I was at the meat section of the supermarket the other day when I overheard a couple of American backpackers discussing what a 'special' sticker on certain cuts of meat might have meant. I enlightened them as one should. I explained that all meat trays that had 'special' marked on them were cuts from animals from farms in our shire that some of us had known personally. They were touched to have been privy to such special inside information, especially from a genuinely special shire resident like myself, and thought that it was a really neat concept, special really!
(From: You're So Special)

"At my first Byron Bay Writers Festival, I assumed the title of Sandy Gandhi, the bi-literal Indian. I took the opportunity to re-title a few books by contemporary India writers to make them more Australian friendly. Like Vikram Seth's 'A Rootable Boy'. I always say if he's not rootable, he's not suitable! And of course, Arundhati Roy's 'A God of Small Thingummies'." (From: Stand Up For Your Writes)